Why we’re proud to be part of the St Luke’s family

Shattered by the loss of a very special husband, father, brother and grandfather, a Plymouth family have found comfort and purpose by raising vital funds for the hospice that offered him – and them – the compassionate support they needed.

Paul Mitchelmore was the heart and soul of his family. When he died it shook their whole world. Their one consolation was that after months of suffering he was comfortable and free from pain in his final days.

“My husband, Paul, was 63 when he passed away in the loving care of St Luke’s in August 2025,” says his wife, Gill. “You don’t really know about what the hospice offers until you and your family really need them.”

Since then Gill, her daughters Sarah, Emma and Lizzie, sons-in-law Andy and Tom, Paul’s brothers Peter and Clive, and sister-in-law Tina, as well as Paul’s loyal friends, have been tireless in staging and participating in events to raise funds and awareness for St Luke’s work.

From Tour de Moor and Midnight Walk to Men’s Day Out, a charity golf day and the London Marathon, a leaf on St Luke’s Memory Tree, a star on the Supernova in-memory Guiding Lights sculpture and taking part in this year’s Light Up a Life appeal at Christmas, the family are embracing every opportunity to show their support.

“Doing things for St Luke’s brings us some sort of comfort,” says Gill. “We feel like we’re paying back for the kindness and care we all received.”

Their determination grew from their experiences when Paul was approaching the end of his life and they discovered what hospice care really means.

A much-loved husband, dad, grandad, brother and friend, Paul retired from Wales & West Utilities at the age of 56 after 40 years of service. Fit and active, he was enjoying life at home in Crownhill with Gill, holidays abroad, playing golf twice a week and spending time with grandchildren Oscar, now 15, Charlie, 12, Jacob, eight and Layla, five.

“Grandad was the apple of their eye. He was always in the garage with them doing all these exciting things. From an early age they were all using screwdrivers and saws and hitting nails!”

Paul’s family and friends raising funds at St Luke’s events

Just after returning from a trip to Dubai to celebrate Gill’s 60th birthday, Paul found a lump in his neck. Then, in March 2024, he was diagnosed with prostate cancer.

“From that day our lives changed completely,” says Gill. Initially hospital doctors told them Paul’s cancer was at stage 2. He began hormone treatment including tablets and 12-weekly injections. At his first oncology appointment they were told it was Stage 4, treatable but not curable and Paul had radiotherapy.

The couple managed one final overseas holiday to Portugal, then a week before Christmas they received the devastating news that the treatment wasn’t working.

They focused on making Christmas special for the children with a family weekend away at Padstow, fearing it could be Paul’s last festive season with everyone.

“He began chemotherapy in January but in April, after four rounds, Paul made the decision to stop,” says Gill. “The treatment was taking too much of a toll on him and he wanted to focus on enjoying the time he had left and have some quality of life.

It was then that Gill and Paul were told he had less than 12 months. He lived for only 15 weeks.

As his health deteriorated, a specialist nurse at the hospital mentioned St Luke’s and explained that the hospice could help Paul with pain management.

“At that point it wasn’t a connection he wanted to hear about or take up… it seemed too final,” says Gill.

Paul and Gill on holiday and Paul with his beloved grandchildren

Like many families, they associated hospice care with the last days of life, although they now understand that St Luke’s can provide support much earlier in the journey.

There were multiple hospital admissions, additional complications and constant outpatient appointments as the family searched for ways to keep him comfortable.

When Paul returned home after a three-week hospital stay, they agreed to accept the support St Luke’s could offer. Looking back, Gill describes it as a turning point.

“When Lizzie, the nurse from St Luke’s, came in she really listened to Paul and got in oxygen to help manage his pain. We also had valuable support with difficult emotions and conversations from Lisa, St Luke’s Patient and Family Support Worker.

“When they came, they always talked to Paul first and treated him with respect. It may sound like a simple thing, but being listened to made a world of difference.

“We just wanted someone to give us answers, not more questions. And St Luke’s were saying: ‘Let us help you’.”

When Paul fell at home one day, Gill called St Luke’s and they immediately sent an urgent care team round.  He was admitted to the hospice specialist unit at Turnchapel that same day to help manage his symptoms.

“When he entered the ward Emma and Liz heard him say: ‘Aah, this is much better’,” recalled Gill. “Knowing Paul was in the hospice made my girls feel at ease, although at that point we thought he would be coming home again.”

What followed changed the way they will think about hospice care forever.

“The compassion and respect is unbelievable at St Luke’s. They always spoke to Paul first every time, right to the end. The doctors had all the time in the world for us and put us so at ease,” says Gill.

Staff helped support her and her daughters, welcomed Peter, Clive and Tina, and made sure the grandchildren felt comfortable visiting the hospice too.

Initially Gill felt able to leave Paul in St Luke’s care overnight so she could get some much-needed sleep but as he became weaker, she wanted to be close by.

“I decided I was staying. Then Tina and Clive said they were not leaving me so we were all there. Everyone at St Luke’s was so kind. They accommodated us and fed us. Clive was on the sofa and they gave him pillows and blankets.”

While keeping vigil at Paul’s bedside, Tina began reading information about St Luke’s and devised a little quiz.

“She looked up a lot of facts on the website and how the hospice was funded mostly by donations. We learned a lot about St Luke’s that night while we were watching Paul breathing.”

It was information that made a real impact. The family’s subsequent fundraising activities can be traced back to Paul’s final days and a desire to make sure other people can continue to receive the kind of support they all had.

“Paul didn’t want a funeral so we had a simple cremation and then held a celebration of his life at Yelverton Golf Club where he was a much-loved member. It was all about remembering Paul rather than mourning him, and we held a collection for St Luke’s.”

Sarah, Andy and their sons saddled up for the Tour de Moor cycle challenge last October. Tina organised a Tesco collection and a coffee and cake morning that raised £2,000.

One of Lizzie’s proudest moments was completing the London Marathon in her dad’s memory after quietly applying for one of St Luke’s bond places while Paul was at the hospice. She raised a phenomenal £10,000. She also arranged a fundraiser with her netball team, Plymouth Pilgrims.

Paul’s brothers and friends walked in his honour at Men’s Day Out, while members of the golf club organised a charity golf day for St Luke’s and there’s now a memorial bench for Paul beside the 17th hole.

Gill, good friend Karen, Emma, Lizzie, Peter, Jacob and Layla strode out together at St Luke’s Midnight Walk in July and the family have dedicated a leaf to Paul on the Memory Tree at Turnchapel.

On the anniversary of Paul’s death, they gathered at St Luke’s to have a cuppa in the café before walking to Mountbatten to see the striking Supernova in-memory lighthouse featuring a star dedicated to Paul. One of the sculptures in St Luke’s Guiding Lights arts trail, which Gill and Paul’s grandchildren visited in the summer, it will soon be finding its permanent home in the hospice grounds.

Paul was the heart and soul of his family, and in many ways he still is.

“He will never be forgotten,” says Gill. “He is loved, missed and continues to bring us together, even though he is no longer here.

“St Luke’s is very much part of our family now, just as we are part of theirs. The hospice will always hold a special place in our hearts and we will continue to support them in memory of Paul, helping ensure the kindness and care they gave to our family can be there for others when they need it most.

“We will be remembering him at a St Luke’s Light Up a Life service again this year. And Lizzie was thrilled to be asked to walk up the aisle at St Andrew’s Church holding a candle in recognition of her fantastic London Marathon achievement.”

Lizzie running the London marathon in honour of her dad

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