Making milestone moments thanks to St Luke’s

24th April 2025

300 miles to say thank you for the memories

Getting married and giving birth are milestones in our lives that we always imagine our parents will be around to witness.

For Emma Fleming-Cooney, it was thanks to the comforting care of St Luke’s that enabled her mum Trisha Hilton to be able to watch her as she said I do to her now husband Thomas and meet her baby boy.

This summer Emma is embarking on an epic challenge of walking 300 miles in memory of her mum and as a way of saying thank you to St Luke’s for the care the family received.

Forever grateful

2024 was an eventful year for Emma and her family for a multitude of reasons. The year of big ‘life events’ as she puts it kicked off on New Year’s Day 2024 when her son Leo made a quick entry into the world at 8.21am that morning. New parent life was off to an exhausting start as the couple spent the next 2 weeks in and out of hospital as Leo had jaundice, but aside from that he was a very happy, healthy baby boy. However, the family were dealt a crushing blow when it was confirmed that Emma’s mum Trisha had terminal cancer.

Emma, who lives in Burnley with Thomas, Leo and their dog Narla, describes how their world was turned upside down when her mum got her cancer diagnosis.

“In 2023 mum thought she had hurt her back while at work, after going to and from the doctors they initially thought it could have been Arthritis and so went for scans and tests to confirm. The final tests and results came back around December 2023 and January 2024 that mum had a tumour on her spine which was unfortunately cancerous. Mum’s pain was becoming a struggle to manage at that time as well and with it being the Christmas period, everything took that little bit longer than it should have.

“As mum’s pain increased her mobility reduced, which meant that dad had to pick up more and more of a carer role. Mum and dad began to have a St Luke’s nurse attend their home called Jamie. She has been amazing and has been a fantastic support for dad. This was our first contact with St Luke’s, and the care our family received during mum’s time with them was wonderful.”

Trisha’s health was slowly deteriorating, so when Leo was 2 months old Emma travelled the 300 miles down to Plymouth so that her mum could meet her grandson for the first time.

“On our second day, mum was admitted to hospital with a perforated bowel and sadly, after 1 month in hospital and 3 weeks in St Luke’s, mum passed away. I spent most days going to hospital with my dad, sister, and little boy, to spend time with mum. It was really hard to see mum in so much pain, she was always so strong and independent so to see her not being able to move without hurting was tough. Despite the horrible situation, I am forever grateful that mum got to meet my son.”

A strong, resilient and amazing woman

Conversations about death and dying can be incredibly difficult, but it is something we encourage here at St Luke’s, and it was due to the reality of her mum’s health while she was in hospital, that Emma realised she may have to plan for the worst.

“Tom and I had booked our wedding for August 2025, and unfortunately with mum being given only a couple of months, it meant that we knew mum would no longer be here to see us get married. As such, we planned a wedding in a week and with the help of Jamie from St Luke’s and the wonderful co-operation of the NHS staff from Derriford Hospital, they got mum there. I will forever cherish the memories from that day and mum showed what a strong, resilient, amazing woman she truly was.”

Community nurse specialist Jamie-Leigh Jennings joined Trisha for the day at Emma and Thomas’ wedding, giving her the opportunity to see her daughter on one of the most special days of her life.

Making positive memories

Jamie said: “It was really important to Trisha to be able to attend Emma and Thomas’ wedding, but she was apprehensive due to her deterioration. I had a day off so I offered to attend and support her.

“As a community palliative nurse It’s always humbling to be invited into people’s homes when they are at their most vulnerable, this was an honour to be welcomed into something very personal and private usually only for family and friends.

“A good death is just as important as a good life, and just because you’re dying doesn’t mean you have to stop living. Death and dying can be seen as a negative part of life so it’s lovely to be able to help make positive memories during this time.”

Saying goodbye

It was soon after the wedding that Trisha came to our specialist unit at Turnchapel, where she enjoyed lots of time out in our garden and even a visit from the Easter bunny.

“Mum did seem to improve a little, which after doing a lot of research, is normal. I then got a message from my sister saying that mum had took a turn and we should think about travelling down. We travelled the next day, and mum had been taken into a private room. We spent the next week going to see mum every day, and spent a couple of nights in mum’s room but as it usually happens, mum passed away while none of us were there. During that week, all the staff were so lovely and dad got all the support he needed.

“Since mum’s passing, dad has continued to receive support from St Luke’s. Grief is individual to each person and how they deal with it varies. For me, I had been through the birth of a baby, marrying the most amazing person, and the death of mum within 4 months so I pushed it to the back of my mind as I wanted some normality back. We then made the decision to buy a new build house, and I went back to work after maternity leave, which again gave me the opportunity to focus on something other than my grief.

“Despite (in her own words) not ‘doing babies’, mum loved becoming Nana to her grandchildren. There was always a ‘cakey tea’ at various National Trust properties but mainly at Cotehele where mum first volunteered in the gardens and then began working as a collections assistant in the house. Cotehele will always be a special place to us as a family. Christmas 2024 was very hard visiting family for the first time since mum’s passing and going to Cotehele for the tradition of pictures under the garland. With everything else in my life starting to calm down, this trip highlighted that I had put off my grief and the loss of mum was still very raw nearly a year on.”

300 miles for mum

In honour of her mum, Emma has decided to set herself the challenge of walking 300 miles over the next 6 months in dedicated walks, all in aid of St Luke’s.

“Mum was never happier than when she was outdoors. Whether it was walking, riding, gardening or something else, it didn’t matter.  She was always first in the sea when we visited the beach, no matter how cold it was. Alongside my sister, mum did a number of walks, including a 26 mile walk around Widecombe in the Moor for Marie Curie and she organised various walks on the moor and coast, encouraging others to join in, whether they really wanted to or not!

“I knew I wanted to do something for the anniversary of mum’s death, and I wanted to try and raise some money for St Luke’s as the care they provide is exceptional. The best way I could think to honour mum was to do a walk of some kind. She was a very outdoorsy person, our family holidays as children were always to Devon and Cornwall to explore the countryside. As the distance between my house in Burnley and the hospice at Turnchapel is 300 miles, it felt right that this was the challenge I wanted to do.

“The miles I am counting are only from specific walks which I am tracking. These walks are being completed alongside my everyday life. With a little one and working shifts this can be challenging, but blocking out specified times for time just for me to do the walks has been beneficial. The walks have given me the time and space to just be in the moment and explore the amazing countryside that is on my doorstep. It has given me the opportunity to think through my experiences of last year and tackle my grief head on. I miss mum every day, and while it will never get any easier, I am learning how to live alongside the loss.”

Emma’s JustGiving page Do it for St Luke’s

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