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BLOG: All you need is love – first Father’s Day without Dad

His gentle humour, a shared visit to Stonehenge and The Beatles’ music are just three of the things that Suzy Bennett thinks about, remembering her much-loved dad Jim Tozer, who sadly died last October, aged 68.

With today being the Plymouth comedian’s first Father’s Day without this special man, who received our care at home before he passed away, she will be spending it with her mum Jeanette, having a ‘duvet day’ as they reminisce, looking through photos from family holidays with Jim and watching films he used to enjoy with them.

While being on lockdown because of the pandemic means they can’t be joined at home by Suzy’s brother Simon and his children Amy, Thomas, Robert and James, all of whom dearly loved spending time with their grandad, they’ll have a ‘drive-by’ visit from them or link up via video-call instead.

Perhaps, too, there’ll be a visit from ‘Pauly’, the friendly blackbird who often appeared in the garden of the family home when Jim was in in his last months of life and who continues to be a regular there.

Suzy said: “It was typical of Dad’s humour that he named him Pauly after Paul McCartney because he was a huge Beatles fan and was thinking of their song ‘Blackbird’. That still makes me smile.

“Music was so much part of Dad’s life. He used to spend hours upstairs writing, recording or just listening to his favourite artists. That’s why we’ve left his room with his guitar and PlayStation just as it was. And the house is full of items emblazoned with the words ‘All You Need is Love’ – the classic Beatles’ song that was special to him.”

Thinking of Father’s Days past, Suzy remembers happy times when the family visited Plymouth Hoe and tucked into fish and chips or ice-cream.

She said: “It was all quite low-key because Dad didn’t like a fuss, and that was very much in keeping with the modest man he was. I miss him so much, and even now catch myself thinking that he’ll still pop his head around the door at any moment.

“Mum and I still talk about Dad all the time, and Father’s Day will be no different. The lyrics to ’All You Need is Love’ seem all the more poignant now. It’s hard being without him and sometimes I struggle but my love for him continues and the memories I have of him go forward with me.”

Learn more how St Luke’s can support you through bereavement.